Published: March 27th, 2013 | Tags: The Real World, Adrian Peterson, Buddy Nix, Carson Palmer, Drew Stanton, James Harrison, Jay Cutler, Larry Fitzgerald, MTV, Ray Lewis, Real world, Russell Wilson, Terence Newman, Tim Tebow, Tom Brady, Zoltan Mesko
“The Real World” will commence its 28th season on Wednesday. The king of all reality shows started out as social experiment to bring together seven motivated strangers to see what would happen when people stopped being polite, and started getting real. Now it’s devolved into seven strangers on a summer vacation seeing how much alcohol they can consume in a hot tub.
And while the NFL has had great success with shows such as “Hard Knocks”, we’re still missing a great NFL-version of “The Real World”.
Or are we?
Did you know the actual 28th season of “The Real World” was filmed with seven NFL stars? But unfortunately, it will never air. Here is the official cast listing and episode guide for the lost season of “The Real World: NFL.”
Jay Cutler – misunderstood, brooding guy
Tim Tebow – the innocent guy
Terence Newman – the life of the party
Adrian Peterson – the hard working guy
James Harrison – the bad boy
Ray Lewis – the Godfather
Zoltan Mesko – the wacky foreigner
Episode 1: The cast gets to know each other by hitting the town and then brings the party back to their new home; disagreements about the dishes, musical taste and whether Tebow really is a quarterback raises tension in the house; Mesko is caught by Lewis trying to imitate his dance moves, hilarity ensues; Cutler says Harrison hit him illegally, and the linebacker is fined.
Episode 2: Harrison appeals the fine, but it is upheld; the house guests have a meeting and Harrison is released; Cutler’s smoking causes concern for the roommates, who call a house meeting; Newman grows concerned when his agent won’t return his calls.
Episode 3: Tensions rise between Tebow and Lewis compete for the title of house spiritual leader; Cutler eats peanut butter out of the jar with his fingers, roommates are concerned, call house meeting; the house guests are promised a big name guest joining them, are disappointed when the newest cast member is Drew Stanton.
Episode 4 (Part 1): The house guests compete for a vacation prize by splitting into two teams; Cutler refuses to wash dishes, roommates call house meeting; feelings are hurt when nobody wants Tebow on their team; Lewis team’s win, says it was divine intervention; Lewis immediate retires from reality television.
Episode 4 (Part 2): Adrian realizes he tore his ACL during the competition, vows to return for the next one; to make it up to Tebow, the gang decides to take him out to a surprise party at Chuck E. Cheese. The night takes a sour note when everybody returns home and realizes Timmy is still waiting for a ride back at the parking lot; Cutler cuts toe nails in the living room, leaves clippings a coffee table, roommates call a house meeting.
Episode 5: Still feeling the guilt of not picking him during the competition and leaving him at Chucky E. Cheese, the house guests sign up Tebow to be on “The Bachelor”. Cutler refuses to make his bed, concerned roommates call house meeting; The house guests get a new cast member, Larry Fitzgerald. But upon seeing Stanton, Fitzgerald walks out of the house and is never seen again.
Episode 6: Tebow is rejected for “The Bachelor” and the show instead casts Mesko as its next contestant; Peterson continues his rehab and beats Stanton in a foot race, even on crutches; Cutler acts like perfect roommate, which causes even more concern about Cutler, so they call a house meeting; Matt Flynn is brought in as the next house guest, and is immediately replaced by Russell Wilson before he can move in.
Episode 7: Stanton draws a little concerned when Carson Palmer is rumored to be joining the cast, him and Tebow have a heart-to-heart about last season in New York; Mesko and Newman start to work on a screen play for a buddy-cop movie; cast members wonder why Cutler never smiles, call house meeting.
Episode 8: Mesko is delighted when teammate Tom Brady drops by for a visit, but Stanton and Tebow feel threatened; Cutler calls house meeting to say no more house meetings; Newman calls Bills GM Buddy Nix and tries to convince him to take on Tebow for next season.
Episode 9: Road trip! The cast is given an all-expense paid trip to Hawaii, but realize they have been duped when it was just a ruse to get them all to the Pro Bowl. All except Tebow, who was left back at the house.
Episode 10: In the season finale, the group gets together to talk about their experiences of the past few months and what is in store for them in the future. The group decides Tebow has a huge athletic future … in “The Challenge”.
Adam Rank has never won an award. For anything. We don’t mean to be harsh, but it’s true. You can follow him on Twitter @adamrank. Oh, and if you liked this (right!), check him out on the latest “Dave Dameshek Football Program“. Which, come to think of it won an award. So Rank has won something meaningful. Yes, meaningful unlike this latest post. Are we right? But follow him on Twitter, please. He’s taking us to lunch if he gets 25 more Twitter followers today.