Monday Nightmare: No playoffs for me

Welcome to the Monday Nightmare and this truly was the most anxiety-filled night of fantasy football I’ve ever experienced. Now, if you’ve followed me at all you know how I longingly refer to my League of Record.

And for those of you unfamiliar, your “League of Record” is the league you care about the most. A lot of us play in multiple leagues but there is one we want to win more than the others. My League of Record is with my longtime friends from my hometown of Corona, Calif.

So here was my scenario. As I said here in Like/Dislike, Cam Newton was going to hurt me badly this week. And he did. But I went up against Newton, Calvin Johnson and the Texans defense. I had no chance; especially since Eric Decker has disappeared and Reggie Bush was forced into my lineup because of Percy Harvin’s injury. But I still manage to have the second-highest total of the week thanks to Andy Luck, Wes Welker and Jamaal Charles.

Not that it matters, as it looks like I could be out of the playoffs (with a 7-6 record in a 10-team league no less). Here’s what I needed to happen: If Kai Forbath had outscored Ahmad Bradshaw by 30 points, I would have won outright and take the win without help. Didn’t happen.

Option B, Freddy Morris scores less than 8.90 points, and one of my competitors finishes at 6-7. Didn’t happen. The one time I needed Shanahanigans, and I didn’t get it. Oh, and I had a chance to pick up Morris on waivers this year and passed. So that was extra-brutal.

Option C was Forbath outscores Hakeem Nicks and I take a tie-breaker with another buddy (actually, Option B’s twin brother). I could have used another field goal, but a quick check of the math says I failed on that, too. Seriously, a last-second field goal would have worked there, but Morris got the first down. Forget my fantasy life.

One possible, one plausible and one not-happening options, and I went 0-3. I (expletive) hate fantasy football. To be honest, I don’t care what happens in the rest of my leagues.

If you have a tale of woe about how you missed the playoffs, let’s share. Consider this your fantasy therapy couch and this is one great big group session. Let it all hang out, you will feel better when you do.

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