Watching the draft can be a daunting task for the uninitiated because many of the NFL Network commentators use a language that rivals the geek speak of your typical ComicCon (and I can say that seeing how I watch every minute of the draft and spend a considerable amount of time at the San Diego ComicCon every year.)

With that in mind, allow me to offer you an NFL draft glossary to help you understand what these guys are talking about this April.

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Best player available
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What you think it means: We want to draft the best player available.
What it actually means: We have no idea what we’re doing and we’re just winging it now.

(Associated Press)

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Cabin fever
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What you think it means: A quarterback who flees the pocket too early.
What it actually means: How Vikings fans feel watching a football game in the Metrodome.

(Associated Press)

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Falling stock
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What you think it means: A once-highly regarded player is falling down draft boards.
What is actually means: He would be perfect for the Raiders.

(Associated Press)

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Good punch
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What you think it means: A lineman who gets good extensions with his arm while blocking.
What it doesn’t mean: Legarrette Blount’s initial scouting report.

(Associated Press)

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Hands like feet
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What you think it means: Bad hands.
What it actually means: Go play soccer.

(Associated Press)

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Jitterbug runner
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What you think it means: A shifty running back.
What it actually means: Player most likely to appear on “Dancing with the Stars.”

(Associated Press)

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One-trick pony
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What you think it means: A guy who is only good at one thing.
What it actually means: Tim Tebow.

(Charles Krupa/Associated Press)

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Possession guy
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What you think it means: A receiver with great hands.
What it actually means: Slow.

(Associated Press)

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Rising stock
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What you think it means: He’s gaining in popularity among scouts and GMs.
What it actually means: Good job not screwing up, kid.

(Associated Press)

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Seeing ghosts
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What you think it means: A quarterback who gets sacked a lot.
What it actually means: What happens to Tony Romo every time the playoffs start. Just kidding, Tony. This is what happens to him in December.

(Associated Press)

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This guy has character issues
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What you think it means: Issues from the players past are coming back to haunt him now.
What it actually means: He would be perfect for the Lions.

(Associated Press)

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Throwing from all platforms
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What you think it means: A quarterback can throw from many different angles.
What it actually means: A quarterback who can tweet, text and perform well on TV.

(Associated Press)

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We’ll look to upgrade all positions
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What you think it means: The team is looking to upgrade all positions.
What it actually means: Our players stink.

(Associated Press/US Presswire)

You can follow Adam Rank via Twitter or via Facebook. Also be sure to catch the latest “Dave Dameshek Football Program.”

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