It was either Socrates or Homer Simpson who once said “All I know is that I know nothing.” That could apply to the average fantasy football owner most weeks. After all, it was a week that saw John Skelton outscore Tom Brady. If you knew that was going to happen, we’d like you to accompany us on our next trip to Las Vegas. Until then, the rest of us will mope over our mistakes in the latest edition of #FantasyFauxPasMonday.

Conventional wisdom says that NFL running backs need two hands to be healthy. Someone forgot to tell Willis McGahee, who ran all over the Raiders after breaking his right hand in Week 7. Instead, it was fantasy owners like @Austin_Chissus left wringing their hands.

Not starting Willis McGahee because of his hand. Who would start a guy who had surgery two weeks ago?

Certainly not us. That’s who.

Then there’s the curious case of Vincent Jackson, who has been consistent in 2011. Consistently inconsistent, that is. Never fear, @ETthomehome had a remedy for that.

I was pissed at Vincent Jackson for his lack of production lately so I benched. I sure showed him!

While we try not to laugh at the pain of others on Fantasy Faux Pas Monday, this was truly one of the funniest tweets we’ve received all season. However, one thing that is no laughing matter — #shanahanigans. This week, @CUChalk was among the owners who fell victim to Mike Shanahan’s nefarious player rotations.

choosing to pick up Ryan Torain over Roy Helu/falling victim to Shanahanigans

Someone should organize a telethon for all of the victims of Shanahanigans. We could even get this kid to sing.

But while fantasy owners are running away from Redskins like Todd Haley from a razor, others have opted to stay the course. However for some, like @reservoirzombie, perseverance is more a vice than a virtue.

“I’ll keep Robert Meachem in my lineup for the 9th week in a row.”

Yeah, feel free to jump off that train anytime now. Finally, this week’s big winner (loser?) is @qndarwin, who reminds us that eventually the machines will rule us all..starting with our fantasy football rosters.

Julio Jones on bench (tried to start him 7 min before game time + had internet connection problems…ugh!)

It’s a little-known fact that Skynet went haywire in Terminator 2: Judgment Day after drafting Chris Johnson. Oh well, as long as Earth remains intact, next week is a new week. Here’s to not stubbing our toes.

– Marcas Grant

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