You never thought it would happen to a guy like Tom Brady, but he’s officially reached his midlife crisis. You would think that a supermodel wife and three Super Bowl rings would prevent that. His new ponytail says otherwise (thank you, Sports Grid).
Although, you probably should blame David Beckham‘s influence for this after the two hung out last summer. Thanks a lot, Beckham. Not only have you failed to make soccer any more popular here in the States, you have turned one of our nation’s heroes into a ponytail guy.
And really, that barely classifies as a ponytail, too.
That thing — I guess I will concede and call it a ponytail — looks like the kind of ponytail that you would see from that guy with the receding, horseshoe-hairstyle who is trying to cling to his fleeting moments of vitality. Trust me, I can identify with the feeling.
But the ponytail is the wrong way to go about it. Do you think Hugh Jackman would sport a ponytail? Hell no. Get a new car, Tom. Wear a Hawaiian shirt to work. Maybe win a playoff game. Anything but the ponytail.
Although, in fairness, it’s still cooler than Peyton Manning‘s hair.
Be sure to check out our photo gallery of the dos and don’ts of hairstyles in the NFL.